The last time I posted anything about Stella was in March 2023. I know, I've been a very lax dressage blogger. That's because there hasn't been much to blog about. In short, despite countless hours spent caring for and riding Stella, many lessons with Suzan, and the three shows in which we've competed since my last post, it doesn't feel like we've made any progress. In fact, I think things have gotten worse. Oh, her training is farther along, but her tenseness has only increased, no matter what I've tried. Years ago when my first Morgan was young, a good friend told me that eight was the magic age for mental maturity in Morgans. Stella is now eight, and hotter than she's ever been. (That same friend now thinks I should try endurance riding with her, but that would take more time and hauling than I could fit into my life and I'm not convinced it would change anything.) Relaxation is foundational in dressage but is foreign to Stella, so there is no point in trying to show her anymore, or even take lessons. And while I persevere in working with her, I don't think either of us is having much fun.
Earlier this year I felt so hopeless that I called Suzan to get her advice. I'm not sure what I expected, but she surprised me by saying that Stella is the hottest horse she's ever worked with. She thinks that I'm doing an amazing job with her, and that anyone else would probably totally blow Stella's mind and ruin her. Said that breeding her might settle her mentally, but I don't have any interest in doing that. That suggestion did make me wonder out loud about putting Stella on Regu-Mate, and Suzan thought it was worth a try. Unfortunately, like the two 'calming supplements' I've tried, Regu-Mate didn't affect any change in Stella, so after a couple months I stopped using it.
I don't know how to solve a problem like Stella. Maybe a horse better suited to dressage will fall into my lap someday; maybe a guaranteed breeding-only home will open up for Stella. In the meantime I'll keep riding because that's who I am and it keeps my riding muscles in shape.
Looking through a year's worth of photos, below, gives me pleasure because she's just so beautiful, and makes me want to cry from frustration. Unless and until that changes, there will be no new posts here, because we are not dancing.
9 comments:
This makes me super sad. I have enjoyed your blog and missed you. At the same it is easy to see that Stella’s temperament may not be a match with you desires and goals, and the understandable frustration in doing everything you can, and yet no real progress has to be discouraging. I hope you won’t give up. Maybe yes, on Stella as a dressage horse, but not on your hopes and dreams and definitely not wasting your talent. Maybe, by putting it out there that it’s just not working through no fault One of your own will open up some new doors. Maybe for both of you I hope you will post more :-)
I’m not a horse person at all but I’ve very much enjoyed reading your adventures with Stella. She is a beautiful, beautiful horse. I’m sad for both of you.
Thanks to both of you for commenting; nice to know after all this time that people noticed that I had posted. To the first Anonymous, I'm not sure that Stella's temperament is well suited to ANY discipline, except maybe the endurance my friend suggested. Stella comes from Park Horse bloodlines and would certainly catch the eye of someone looking for a flashy mover for Park Horse or English Pleasure classes, but that is where Suzan thinks Stella's mind would be fried.
It's nice to see an update, even if it's not as happy as we would like. I do think you've done an amazing job with Stella. Hot and tense horses can be so difficult to chill out. You've done an amazing job with her and have continue beyond what many would have. She's gorgeous in the photos you posted. And I totally get not having time for endurance riding.
Alanna, your kind words mean a lot. I've been pondering options for getting her out for miles of riding and haven't come up with any good ideas yet.
I am sorry you are so frustrated and disappointed. I completely understand. I'd really like to see you with a different horse, but what to do with her is a real challenge. :-/
I’m very sorry that Stella isn’t working out. I do not feel like breeding her would help. We foster a mare for our local horse rescue. She was a broodmare, and the year she failed to get pregnant, they dumped her at the livestock auction. Luckily, the rescue outbid the kill buyers, and she came to live with us. It has taken 2 years for her to transform into the confident, happy girl she is now. The first time my vet came out, she took one look at the vet truck and tried to jump out of her stall and run. She was terrified. My vet is a wonderful human, and he said the life of a broodmare is not a happy life. She had been abused. So no, I would not want lovely Stella to be a broodmare. Maybe she is slow to mature and just needs more time. Regardless, the best of luck to you both.
Sara and Terry, since I believe we are to be good stewards of all in our care I can't just 'dump' Stella, and wouldn't even if a more suitable mount fell into my lap. So I will keep working with her and hope for better times ahead.
A flibbertyjibbit, a will-'o-the-wisp . . . I know you must be heartbroken that Stella has just not settled the way you had hoped that she would. She's so beautiful, and you are such a beautiful pair together. I know how much you wanted her to be a wonderful dancing partner. I'm really sorry. I like what the first Anonymous poster said about you just having put it out there (here) on the page - you never know what that could open up for the Universe to bring you the partner you want. Or if Stella might finally just calm herself down. After she handily cleared your fence a few weeks ago, do you think maybe she's a jumper?? Is that even something you have any interest in at all?
It could also be that maybe now is the time for you to focus your energy on Poppy and the agility work that you guys are doing so well together. It's been my experience that stuff goes in cycles, but however it goes, I know you to be a good steward of your animals, and I know you will continue to work with Stella and maybe one day it will all just click for her. I know that doesn't make it any easier now, though.
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